In loving memory of Tom Hogg, 1943–2023
MoFunny for
April 30, 2027
Why is Milk white?
+----- Answer At The End -----+
How old would you be if you didn't know how old you are? - Satchel Paige
The only way to be absolutely safe is never to tray anything for the first time. - Magnus Pyke
In the mountains of truth you never climb in vain. - Friedrich Nietzsche
Since 1912, Cracker Jack has given out over 23 billion prizes. Only 18 billion were plastic whistles.
The hummigbird has a cleft tongue comprised of two blades which it manipulates like a pair of forceps to extract minute insects from flowers.
Why can't women put on mascara with their mouths closed?
Grandpa was always going on about the good old days, and the lower cost of living, in particular.
"When I was a kid, my mom could send me to the store, and I'd get a salami, two pints of milk, 6 oranges, 2 loaves o' bread, a magazine, and some new blue jeans... all for a dollar!!"
Then Grandpa said sadly, "You can't DO that anymore..... they got those darn video cameras everywhere you look."
Driving my car one afternoon, I rolled through a stop sign. I was pulled over by a police officer who recognized me as his former English teacher.
"Mrs. Brown," he said, "those stop signs are periods, not commas."
Why do you need an appointment to see a psychic?
A police car pulls up in front of grandma Bessie's house, and grandpa Morris gets out.
The polite policeman explained that this elderly gentleman said that he was lost in the park ... and couldn't find his way home.
"Oy Morris," said grandma, " You've been going to that park for over 30 years! So how could you get lost?"
Leaning close to grandma, so that the policeman couldn't hear. Morris whispered, "Lost I wasn't. I was just too tired to walk home."
A man has a dog that snores in his sleep. Annoyed, because she can't sleep, his wife goes to the vet to see if he can help.
The vet tells the woman to tie a ribbon around the dog's testicles and he will stop snoring.
A few hours after going to bed, the dog is snoring as usual. Finally, unable to sleep, she goes to the closet and grabs a piece of ribbon and ties it around the dog's testicles, and sure enough, the dog stops snoring.
The woman is amazed!
Later that night, her husband returns home drunk from being out with his buddies. He climbs into bed, falls asleep, and begins snoring very loudly.
The woman thinks maybe the ribbon will work on him. So she goes to the closet again, grabs a piece of ribbon, and ties it around her husband's testicles.
Amazingly, it also works on him! The woman sleeps very soundly.
The next morning, the husband wakes up very hung over. He tumbles into the bathroom to urinate. As he is standing in front of the toilet, he looks in the mirror and sees a blue ribbon attached to his privates.
He is very confused, and, as he walks back into the bedroom, he notices a red ribbon attached to his dog's testicles.
He shakes his head, looks down at the dog and says:
"Boy, don't remember where we were or what we did, but by God, we got first and second place!"
You might be a redneck if…
You don't think Jeff Foxworthy's jokes are funny.
I am five feet, three inches tall and pleasingly plump. After I had a minor accident, my mother accompanied me to the emergency room. The triage nurse asked for my height and weight, and I blurted out, "Five-foot-eight and 125 pounds."
While the nurse pondered over this information, my mother leaned over to me. "Sweetheart," she gently chided, "this is not the Internet."
I walked into a hair salon with my husband and three kids in tow and asked loudly, "How much do you charge for a shampoo and a blow job?" I immediately turned around and walked back out and never went back! My husband didn't say a word... he knew better.
Random Cartoon Title: Very bright baby
Why is Milk white?
Those chalky-white mustaches that color our lips after chugging down a refreshing ice-cold glass of creamy milk is caused by the protein called Casein.
Rich in calcium, Casein helps contribute to milk's white color.
In addition, the cream that is found in milk contains white colored fat. The more cream in milk the more white it is.
Low and non-fat milk appear more grayish rather than white because they contain less cream.
Another reason milk looks white to our naked eyes is because some objects do not absorb very much light. Rather than absorb light, these objects reflect light. For instance, red colored objects reflect only red light and absorb the other colors of light in the rainbow spectrum. The molecules that make up Casein and cream reflect light. That's why milk is white.