In loving memory of Tom Hogg, 1943–2023

MoFunny for

Thursday

December 23, 2027

Share this page

Trivia question....

What happens to bees in winter?

+----- Answer At The End -----+


Consider these words of wisdom....

Time cools, time clarifies; no mood can be maintained quite unaltered through the course of hours. -- Mark Twain

Share

I happen to feel that the degree of a person's intelligence is directly reflected by the number of conflicting attitudes she can bring to bear on the same topic. -- Lisa Alther, Kinflicks, 1975

Share

It's the soul's duty to be loyal to its own desires. It must abandon itself to its master passion. -- Rebecca West, O Magazine, September 2003

Share

I bet ya' didn't know....

Name the classic TV comedy that began with the theme song "You're My Greatest Love." It was THE HONEYMOONERS. Jackie Gleason wrote the song.

Share

Crayola has renamed only three crayon colors in its corporate history. In 1958, Prussian Blue was renamed Midnight Blue because, according to teachers, children could no longer relate to Prussian history. In 1962, Flesh was renamed Peach to recognize that not everyone's skin is the same shade. In 1999, Indian Red was renamed Chestnut after a public contest, which drew more than 100,000 entries; rejected contest entry names included ginger spice, crab claw red, old penny, and baseball mitt.

Share

Things that make you go Hmmm....

What do little birdies see when they get knocked unconscious?

Share

Jokes & stories....

Joke

A man approached a local in a village he was visiting. "What's the quickest way to York?"

The local scratched his head.

"Are you walking or driving?" he asked the stranger.

"I'm driving."

"That's the quickest way!"

Joke

A cardiac specialist died and at his funeral the coffin was placed in front of a huge mock-up of a heart made up of flowers. When the pastor finished with the sermon and eulogy, and after everyone said their goodbyes, the heart opened, the coffin rolled inside and the heart closed.

Just then, one of the mourners burst into laughter.

The guy next to him asked, "Why are you laughing?"

"I was thinking about my own funeral," the man replied.

"What's so funny about that?"

"I'm a gynecologist."

One-liner

Some people itch for success when they should be scratching for it.

Joke

We telemarketers know we're universally loathed. Still, some people are quite pleasant on the phone.

One day I called a number and asked to speak with Mr. Morgan. The woman who answered explained that he no longer lived at that address, but she did have a number where he could be reached.

I thanked her, rang that number, and was greeted with, "Good morning, Highland View Cemetery."

Joke

Pertinent Observations for the Equestrian Neophyte
Tying your horse's reins to a post does no good if you then remove the bridle.
When throwing your saddle over your horse's back, do not let go.
See Law of Inertia: a body in motion tends to remain in motion.
Forgetting to tighten the girth before swinging into the saddle gives you a whole new perspective of your horse.
Before using a crop to encourage your horse to move, be sure it is facing the direction you wish to go.
On a five mile long road with a single mud puddle in it, your horse will shy when you are most likely to fall in the puddle. Same for a single cactus in the desert.
It is a mistake to believe horses have no sense of humor. They think we are funny.
A neophyte rider need waste no time being concerned for his horse's welfare. Your horse knows all about being a horse. Concentrate on your own well being.
Horses smell FEAR. Deodorant won't help.

Red Neck

You might be a redneck if…

The flood history of the area can be seen on your living room walls.

Joke

A fifteen-year-old boy came bounding into the house, and found his mom in bed. He asked if she were sick or something. He was truly concerned.

Mom replied that, as a matter of fact, she didn't feel too well.

The son said, "Well, don't worry a bit about dinner. I'll be happy to carry you down to the stove."

Joke

When the wealthy businessman choked on a fish bone at a restaurant, he was fortunate that a doctor was seated at a nearby table.

Springing up, the doctor skillfully removed the bone and saved his life.

As soon as the fellow had calmed himself and could talk again, he thanked the surgeon enthusiastically and offered to pay him for his services.

"Just name the fee," he croaked gratefully.

"Okay," replied the doctor. "How about half of what you'd have offered when the bone was still stuck in your throat?


Trivia answer....

The survival of the bee through the cold months of winter is largely dependent upon the particular kind of over 1,000 species to which it belongs. Generally speaking, the social bees do not summer in the South during the winter, as do migratory birds, but, instead, live or die in their natural environs.

The young queen bumblebee, who earns her title by being the one egg-laying female, or queen mother, in the colony of social bees, does survive the winter. She does so by burrowing out a hold in a well-drained sandbank, or simply by taking the easy way out by moving into a pre-owned home, such as a deserted mouse nest. Once settled into her nest, she plays happy homemaker and makes beebread from the nectar and the pollen she collected all summer, dumps the load of bread, lays eggs on it, covers it with wax, and relaxes atop it.

Approximately 250,000 eggs later, her Highness washes her hands of the whole thing, and leaves the work to her offspring. As soon as the workers, or fertilized, but non-egg producing females sprout wings, they set to work, and only later get assistance in the form of drones, or unfertilized males. The workers bees and drones, who toiled for the queen all summer, are rewarded for their efforts by a certain death in winter. No bother...they are easily replaced by cheap labor, when the queen lays more eggs in the spring, and puts her new brood to work.

Her counterpart, the young queen honeybee, earns her title by being the first of the special queen cells to emerge, and literally kills her competition, her sisters, in their queen cells, before they have the chance to emerge. The colony she rules is the epitome of efficiency, as it adapts to endure a full range of adverse climates. This species of honey-producing bee, ergo the honeybee, winters in a temperature-controlled hive. The worker bee thermostatically controls his hive with great precision, ensuring that the temperature in the hive's nursery, where baby bees are developing, is maintained at 93 degrees Fahrenheit, and that the temperature in the remainder of the hive does not drop below 45 degrees Fahrenheit. The worker bees accomplish this winter task by fueling up on the honey that they have stored, and by releasing heat as they feast.

The honeybee wisely keeps a stash of honey for himself, after the beekeeper has had his take, thus benefiting from his labor in the warmer months. The social bees utilize these months in a productive manner, by buzzing from flower to flower, sucking up the flowers' nectar as they bumble along. The nectar the bees extract from the flower flows to their honey sacs, which are enlargements of their digestive tracts, and are located in front of the belly of the bees.

Here, the sugars from the sweet nectar of the flower, chemically transform, and are reduced through the honeybee's built-in mechanism to evaporate large quantities of water contained in the nectar. The honeybee stores the end product, honey, both internally, and externally. Pooh-like "honeypot" cells store the thinner version of honey, honey with a short "shelf-life," and honeycombs, the more concentrated version, honey with the "shelf-life" of canned goods in wartime. In a sense, the honeybee is preparing to combat, and to survive, the bitter winter months that lie ahead.