Joke
#1,564He's sooooo mean....
If you kicked him in the heart, you'd break your toe.
He'd steal a dead fly from a blind spider.
He's deaf, and never told his barber.
You couldn't warm up to him if you were cremated together.
He sends get-well cards to hypochondriacs.
He'd cry over your wounds so he could get salt in them.
He has as much use for anyone living as an undertaker.
He applied for a job as a prison warden so he could put tacks in the electric chair.
He folds his newspaper so the guy next to him on the bus can only read half the headline.
He has a testimonial plaque from Kenneth Starr.
He takes sparrows, dips them in peroxide, and sells them as canaries.
He'd throw a drowning man both ends of the rope.
He knifes you in the back, and then has you arrested for carrying a weapon.
He campaigned for a dry county, got it passed, and then moved away.
He never hits a man when he's down--he kicks him.
He never eats his heart out; he'd starve to death.
He'd borrow your pot just to cook your goose.
Only gravediggers would enjoy working for him..