Joke

Once a month, down in the "trendy" area of Columbus, the art galleries open up in the evening and encourage folks to visit the showings.
My wife and I went there once. Only once. You see, we went into the very first place and spied this huge canvas with black and yellow blobs of paint all over it. The next painting, by the same artist, was a murky grey color with drips of purple paint and green splotches throughout.

My wife walked over to the artist and, in her cute southern drawl, said, "I don't understand your paintings."

The artist sniffed and said, "I paint what I feel inside me."

She shot back, "You ever tried Alka-Seltzer?"