Joke

The main trouble with mental notes is the ink fades so fast
Ideas are great provided they don't degenerate into work
If you're "not yourself today", enjoy it while ya can
Maybe he/she doesn't "act stupid"; it might be the real thing
If life isn't worth living, what else can you do with it?
Some people not only have bad luck... they're carriers
If a man's "Captain of his ship", his wife's likely the Admiral
Give some women an inch, and they'll rearrange or redecorate it
There's still "incurable romantics" we need better antibiotics
Opportunity may only knock once, but temptation raps for years
Ever notice how ignorance picks-up confidence as it goes along
A billion's the current number of foods made with types of bran
These days, an "underprivileged kid" only has one set of parents
People are more violently opposed to fur than to leather because it's safer to harass rich women than motorcycle gangs.
Those who live by the sword get shot by those who don't.
Today is the last day of your life, so far.